Modern Family 1x17

Truth Be Told, Modern Family has its funny moments. “Alex has cello lesson at eleven and junior congress at noon,” says Clair. “Doesn’t she also have no boyfriends at forever,” Haley chides in while powdering her cheeks. “Don’t you have an eating disorder you need to attend to,” Alex retorts. Now, that’s funny! They’re trying to plan movie night, but Phil can’t make it because he’s seeing his ex-girlfriend Denise. Haley is grossed out by the idea of her father with a woman, Luke is surprised his father had another woman before Clair, and Phil brags he had plenty fun in his time, “and then I met your mom.” “And thank you Phil,” Clair resigns. Naturally Clair doesn’t trust that recently Denise has no ulterior motives. “Women in their 30’s on the internet are like Ninjas. They get in their little, black outfits and try to sneak their way into your marriage,” she reasons. To prove her wrong, Phil invites her over to the house, instead of going the romantic French place Denise had suggested. As long as Clair is in the room, Denise seems harmful enough, but the moment she’s alone with him, she is all over Phil. The look on his face when she hands him her hotel room keycard! Priceless! Now he ponders how many more of his 447 Facebook friends he has been unwittingly flirting with. Things get all uncomfortable again, and Denise has to make a hasty exit.

Meanwhile, Jay tries to console Manny that he lost a part in the school play by hanging a picture in his room. Accidentally he kills Manny’s turtle. Rather than admitting, Jay fakes a crime scene to lay blame on a hungry raccoon. Gloria doesn’t buy it for a minute. “I’m Columbian. I know a fake crime scene when I see one!” she exclaims. Eventually Jay caves in and tells Manny what happened. Since they’re on the topic, Manny wants to tell Jay about that scratch on his Jay. Jay tells him he already knows: it was a raccoon. For his part, Mitchell quit his job at the law office after missing out on too many moments in Lily’s life because his boss is requiring him to work overtime – even on the weekends. “If my daughter can stand up then so can I,” are his parting words. He feels liberated, tingly, his heart is pounding. He has a panic attack. Yup, funny stuff!