Shameless 5x03

“Imagine Britain without Chatsworth Buccaneers, who come on your face for the price of a beer,” Frank Gallagher muses, while his wife Monica dreams she’s having another baby. Her family isn’t too happy about it – it’s not like she’s been a good mother to her children. Mind you, she hasn’t seen a doctor or even taken a home test. “I am most definitely with child,” she smiles, because she’s dreaming of nursery rhymes, chicken and eggs, and she has morning sickness. Even Mandy Maguire doesn’t buy it. Six tests later, they still come out negative. Norma is delighted – and secretly hopes Monica will finally come back to her – and reminds her of their time together, how she was there for her when she was desperate and depressed. Mandy helps her snap out of it, telling her, “Don’t think about the one you’re not having, think about the ones you’ve got.” The kids make her a mother’s day cake for all the ones they’ve missed, so they can start again, and she gets the message.

For his part, Paddy Maguire is planning a fortieth birthday surprise party for his love. “Great woe will descend upon anyone who blows this,” he warns his sons, “Comprendo? Decco.” Foxy Karen is freaking out, for the party will be at The Jockey (as always). Alas, when she steps out for a bit, Ian and Jamie get locked up in the cellar and all customers upstairs rob them blind of all their liquor and furniture. Not even the Maguire scare tactics help to get the pub back into shape for the party. But when Frank explains the consequences of their actions, namely that The Jockey will close for business, they all come scrambling to safe their favorite hangout. “It’s not just a pub, a place of ale, it’s a second home to most of us, first for some,” he explains, “We need that beer flowing.” So the party is back on and both Paddy and Mimi pretend they didn’t know the other knew they knew. A bit slow, this episode, and neither compelling nor hilarious. Let’s hope the season picks up soon again.

Shameless 5x02

This one is all about Mimi, the boss lady of the Irish mob on Chatsworth Estate. Back in the day there was the other Paddy, a bigger fish even that Paddy Maguire. Now he’s out of jail and has business to discuss with Mimi’s Paddy. Paddy Maguire is so nervous, he almost chokes on a cashew nut in the Jokey. It’s our Frank who’s Paddy’s guardian angel that saves his life. From the start of his meet with other Paddy, Paddy’s off on the wrong foot. A drink at the Jokey is his first stop, but other Paddy’s really hoping Paddy set up a woman for him. They walk into the pub, other Paddy admires sexy kitten Karen (as we all do), but seeing Mimi from behind, he asks “It’s not her, is it? A rhino on a joy bag?” Unwittingly, other Paddy sets off marital crises at the Maguires as Mimi spirals into a self-loathing depression, certain her Paddy can’t love her the size she is. There’s nothing her Paddy can do, she throws him out, and in his desperation he ties and gags other Paddy up, for Mimi to finish off as a make up gift. After the situation spirals even further out of control, Mimi and Paddy bond over who is more willing to kill other Paddy out of love for the other. But what business did he have to discuss with Paddy anyway? Other Paddy is retiring, off to Cyprus, wanting to sell Paddy one of his patches to go with some of the others the Maguires stole from him while he was in jail. After all that happened, he’ll ask somebody else!

Meanwhile, Lip has returned to Nottingham University, Ian is hoping to shag up with Carl’s teacher, Carl is hoping to score some girls, Debbie is worried Monica might steal her room, and Liam is becoming a little pyromaniac just like Marty. Outside, Monica’s ex-girlfriend Norma is dealing with a rodent plague, while at the Maguires Shane’s python eats Mimi’s puppy dog and Mick is determined to prove he’s a hard working man, living in his pink Cadillac, sure no one knows he’s gay. “It’s not pink! It’s fuchsia!” Definitely homo. The show is still wicked smart and uproariously funny. Yet it is getting progressively more difficult keeping track of all the characters. I didn’t even mention the idiotic scene at Yvonne’s local shop with the moronic police force, or Mandy’s well-meaning attempt to resolves the Maguires’ crisis. This lack of focus hinders maintaining the audience’s interest in all the various characters. Many, in fact, remain no more than caricatures. The beauty of the series, at first, I felt was its portrayal of the British underclass, drinking and cursing, fucking and fighting, but still managing to get by, by sticking together. There was a bittersweet sordid sense of humor through all the drama, but it was easy to relate to the Gallaghers. Now, I just miss Fiona and Steve, Kev and Veronica; Marty and Sheila are gone, and so is Lip. What is left is mostly meaningless fun at the expense of the criminally poor and the criminally insane.

Shameless 5x01

Vernon Francis Gallagher waxes Shakespearean after electrocuting himself while urinating on a electrical generator. At the hospital a woman he confuses for a nurse tells him it would be a small miracle if he survived the weekend. He starts seeing visions of his twelve-year old self, who confronts him with the meaninglessness of his life. With death at his doorstep, he scrambles to find any significance in his life, his marriages, his children, only to be reminded of his failures, his absence, and his nearly continuous drunken stupor. His younger self reminds Frank of his mother’s death, and how he promised to make her proud. Before he dies, he needs to know what his legacy is. During a bar fight at the Jockey it hits him: this is his legacy, everybody having a merry old time getting drunk, kicking and punching, or having a little screw in the bedroom. Then he learns that the woman at the hospital wasn’t a nurse, but the wife of a dying patient, who resented his odious behavior – not to mention the stench coming out of his mouth. He’ll live.

Meanwhile Lip returns from university, but the cheer doesn’t last long. His girlfriend from Nottingham arrives, sending Mandy in a tantrum. They agreed to an open relationship, but with four simple rules: use condoms, don’t get involved, don’t tell, and don’t bring it home. Lip hasn’t even been able to abide by a single one of these rules. He lies to both girls, then tries to make amends with both. When he can’t choose, the other girl, Alex, suggests sharing and offers to be a part of Katie’s life. That spins Mandy over the edge, you don’t involve her daughter in this sordid mess. After the above mentioned bar fight ensued, Mandy breaks up with Lip, so he can fulfill his dreams. For her part, busy-body Lillian has started a little brothel business to earn some easy money. She believes she’s helping the girls out, as they would otherwise be on the street. When the local police are tipped off, they can’t believe it’s Lillian. They find the hookers, but no paper trail or evidence of unlawful gain. They have to let her go, leaving her to count her wad of cash. Shameless is called comedy, and it is often hilarious, but it is also profoundly honest about the real life tragedies of living in poverty.

Shameless – Series 4

When we return to Chatsworth Estate, it is Lip’s 18th birthday – except he finds out it is actually his 19th, because his parents delayed his birth registration for a year. He is in for quite a day! Frank accidentally sets Sheila’s kitchen on fire. Kevin and Veronica are arrested in Romania trying to adopt a baby illegally. The Irish mobster Maguires moves in next door. Frank’s first wife Monica decides to move back in after nearly six and a half years. Marty returns with the little baby from Romania, making his way back across the Continent hitching rides. So, crammed in the same house now are Monica, Frank’s four sons – Lip, Ian, Carl and Liam (well, Ian isn’t biologically his) – and Debbie, Carol, Marty and Sue (his girlfriend) and his new baby, plus Lip’s girlfriend Mandy and their baby Katie, too. Honestly, I have no idea what Monica is doing, but Frank never told Sheila he never filed the divorce papers – and that the bigamist is now married to both of them. Sheila is understandably upset by Monica’s return. She dreams of going Kill Bill (parts one and two) on Monica, but she opts for a more subtle approach – trying to get Monica back with Norma. To make it worse, Frank can’t keep it in his pants for too long, and soon is sleeping with his first wife again. Monica wants Frank to tell Sheila they never divorced, and isn’t legally married to Sheila. He can’t handle the pressure or the guilt. But when Sheila catches Monica having a cocktail sausage, she puts two and two together: Monica is neither a vegetarian nor a lesbian, but has been having sex with her Frank. Knives fly, and Frank too. And if that isn’t enough, Sheila and Monica decides it’s up to Frank to choose between them, neither will share. The kids group together in favor of Sheila, of course, Monica left them over six years ago, and Sheila is the best thing to Frank. In the end he chooses Sheila, but when she discovers he is still married to Monica she leaves him for good.

Meanwhile, Jamie Maguire came back from his ten-year prison sentence for murder. Instead of return to his criminal family, he decides to work at the Jockey. Sexy kitten Karen plays cat and mouse with the former jailbird, always playing hard to get, even though she’s the easiest piece on the estate. Knowing he is a Maguire, she doesn’t trust him one bit, but is clearly fancies him – and he is all over her. Then he proposes out of the blue. He’s spent ten years in prison, he doesn’t want to waste anymore time, he knows what he wants out of life: her – and who can blame him? She’s a well right piece of ass. What endears him to her is when she realizes he hasn’t had sex since he went to prison! Naturally, the Maguires use any means necessary to make sure Karen stays with Jamie, which includes manipulation, threats, and tortures. Paddy Maguire fears for his life when three of his former inmates all die within the span of a week under suspicious circumstances. He needs to calm his nerves, but scares the shit out of his doctor. So he prescribes him “placeboesque anti-depressants” for a “pretended depression by proxy”! In the end, Paddy learns it was Jamie who took them all out, because they were planning on killing Paddy and taking over his shady ventures.

In other news, Kash Karib gets himself in such financial trouble, he has to lay Ian off from the convenience store. Yvonne is livid when she finds out Kash has taken out loans on the shop and their house. She never wants to see him ever again. The situation is so serious, they stage his suicide – and he is indeed never seen again. Ian runs into a girl who just stole ten grand worth of scratch cards off the Maguires and now the Gallaghers have to hide her up their attic. When she finds out, Mandy is forced to choose between the two families. She stands up for Lip and Ian, but eventually her father finds out anyway. Even though he’s gay, Ian feels attracted to the girl, and they end up sleeping together. He rushes off with her. She wants to leave town with him, but he feels it’s not right. He returns to his charming gay ways fast with one of the Maguire sons. They snort up post-coital and get caught by Paddy. Briefly Kev’s ex-junkie/prostitute sister Kelly shows up unannounced at the Maguires, not realizing her brother’s in jail in Eastern Europe.

The story of Frank and Monica plays out throughout the whole season. Never mind what Frank sees in her, I cannot figure out why Monica ever decided to return and make everybody’s life miserable. Frank prefers to avoid the whole situation and stay in Sheila’s house. It’s none too surprising that he has to leave there, as Sheila has put up the house for sale. Now he has to move back in with his kids, his not-so-estranged wife and her bird Norma. Debbie tries to wedge herself between Frank and Monica – to the point her mother pushes her to find a lad and get laid. Carl rather wants his family back together and will do anything to get rid of Norma. For her part, Monica plays Frank against Norma. Her bird takes it a wee bit too far, tying Frank up and taking him to the police station on account of attempted rape. “Have you seen her?” Frank exclaims, “yourself?” After Debbie’s had a good word with her, Norma drops the charges on the condition that Franks stays away from Monica until they’re back together – and she even throws in a grand to sweeten the deal! “How much do you love her now, eh, Frank?” The deals falls through, though, when Monica pleads Norma to drop the charges or else she won’t ever forgive her. So, Monica is here to stay, alas.

At the end of the season Lip, the smart one of the family, gets offered three scholarships to choose from so he can go to the university. But where does that leave Mandy and their baby? We will have to wait and see. This leads me to one aspect of the show I find myself struggling with: the loss of my favorite characters. First we saw Fiona and Steve leave, then Kev and Veronica, and Sheila soon after. I adored them, and miss them on the show. Now Lip is leaving for college. That leaves Frank and Debbie (oh, yes, and Karen, too, for obvious reasons). I care much less for the remaining characters. I don’t know where Marty and Sue went. The Maguires are too much of caricatures, and next season we’ll have to deal with Yvonne and her kids. Still, Shameless is one of the most heart-wrenching, delightful, endearing shows you’ll ever see, full of humor and human emotions. You may have heard that HBO is preparing an adaptation for American TV, which is quite a shame. Why can’t Americans get used to the accents, throw in subtitles, and enjoy the original? I would urge you to do yourself a favor and check out the U.K. version before they start airing the rip off, no matter it will feature William H. Macy in the role of Frank Gallagher.

Shameless – Series 3

Now, nobody’s saying that Chatsworth Estate is the Garden of Eden, but it has been a good home to Frank Gallagher and his family. With Fiona and Steve gone, all parental responsibility falls on thirteen-year old Debbie. It’s New Year’s Eve, and while everyone is ringing in 2006 in the pub, Deb is approached by a primary school teacher. Her younger brother Liam is about to be expelled for denouncing god in his Roman Catholic school. Deb worries a home-visit by the teacher will lead to intervention from social services that will tear the family apart. Naturally, she cannot count on her father, so she shaves off Liam’s hair, and tells the teacher he has cancer. Danger averted. But the sad news spreads fast, and soon the local pub is running a charity collection for Liam, a news paper reporter gets involved – and meanwhile, the Gallagher kids have to pile up the lies to avoid telling the truth. Frank is upset to learn in the pub that his son has cancer. Even his ex-wife shows up, threatening to take Liam with her. Then Frank overdoses on liquor, cocaine and horse tranquillizers. It would be sad if it weren’t so funny! Alter in the season, one of the most hilarious scenes happens when Frank is rendered completely sober by a new drug. He appears reflective and even quite intelligent, wondering why Sheila would add to her problems by marrying a mess like him.

Lip is still shagging around, but meanwhile tries to be a good father to Mandy Maguire’s baby. Except that the Maguires are a fearsome Irish criminal family, who refuse to accept him. He earns something of their respect, though, by standing up to them. But they use any excuse to ban him from seeing his baby girl. Ian continues exploring his homosexuality after breaking up with Kash Karib, the owner of the local grocery store. Carl still hasn’t had a girlfriend. All he can do is spy and eavesdrop – and telling Lip’s girlfriend she got the crabs because Lip’s sleeping around! But he finally gets his way with a girl after he shows her his weed plantation in the attic. I wish we would get to see more of that sexy fox, Karen, Sheila’s daughter. She’s pretending to be a lesbo, just to get a job at The Jockey. Sheila is ecstatic to find out her daughter is gay. She invites Karen and Jez over – leading Frank to suggest all three women to do a floor show. But in the end, Karen admits to Jez she’s straight.

Neighbor Kevin gets a serious tip for a horse-racing bet, but Frank screws it up by telling just about everyone on the estate (including a bookie), and so ruining the odds. Kev’s sister begs for a place to stay, she’s finally found what she’s good at and just needs a room. Frank offers her one at Sheila’s only to find out she’s prostituting herself, to Sheila’s great delight. On his 35th birthday, Kev’s mother commits suicide – and if that wasn’t bad enough, his estranged wife Roxy attends the funeral fresh on parole. Veronica is seething with jealousy. Instead of consoling Kev, Vee threatens to leave him. Veronica’s brother Marty is dating a woman Sue, who lodges with the Gallaghers but refuses to contribute to the already tight financial situation. Later we learn she’s seriously in debt for about £12,000. Veronica’s mother Carol is promiscuously maintaining affairs, until she brings home a nudist with a penchant for freaky sex. Yet she gets enraged when she discovers her late husband had an affair with her best friend Lillian some thirty years ago.

In the season finale, Frank and Sheila finally get married, but not before some troubling events ensue. Sheila tells Frank that she has been married before, not only to Eddie Jackson (Karen’s father), but also to some bloke named Sheldon. Veronica then learns that Sheila buried Sheldon in the backyard, (because she couldn’t attend a funeral due to her agoraphobia), with his gold jewelry still on him. Always desperate for money, Vee and Frank dig up the body only to discover Sheldon was stabbed to death with fondue forks! Frank freaks out in a paranoid panic that Sheila is going to kill him next, while Vee is told the gold is all fake. Sheila admits she killed Sheldon because he used to beat her and burn her with his gold medallions. She fears Frank no longer wants to marry her and turns herself in to the police. Meanwhile Frank learns the truth from Kev and Vee, and also finds out that Sheila has opened a joint account in their name. He rushes to the police station to keep her from turning herself in, and asks her to marry him again. When Kev congratulates him at the wedding, Frank shrugs that the marriage isn’t legal anyway, because his ex Monica still hasn’t signed the divorce papers!

Shameless – Series 2b

Back in Chatsworth Estate, Frank Gallagher’s eldest son, Lip, is an A-level student and hopes to earn a scholarship to the U.S. To earn some extra money for expenses, he does other kids’ homework, too. He finds a quiet place to study at a neighbor’s house, but Lip’s younger brother Carl invites his friends over, who trash the place. The neighbor, a woman called Lena, thinks Lip burgled her house and he gets arrested. Everyone pulls their best in to get her things back. In the end Lena drops the charges and starts an affair with Lip. Lip’s also been sleeping with his gay brother Ian’s cover-up girlfriend, Mandy, but now she’s pregnant, even though they’ve always been using rubbers... Ian has to become part of her violently criminal family, or else he’ll have to fess up he’s gay – and Lip will get the blame... Before you know it, they’re throwing an engagement party. Lips saves the day by admitting the baby’s his, and bang the whole lot’s in a fist fight.

No one realized before that Ian’s blood type is incompatible with that of his parents. Lip says that just means someone got it wrong, but Debbie states the obvious, that Ian’s father isn’t their father! Frank recons his wife Monica must have slept with some guy called Gary Bennett. When Ian and Lip look him up they find he’s exactly like Frank – a drunk who can’t even sit on a chair without falling on the floor! Younger sister Debbie makes some pocket money by keeping up a library of copied videos (“borrowed” from Kash’s store) and then rents them out for half price. Accidentally she gets a hold of a homemade “adult” flick, and makes several hundred pounds!

Meanwhile, Fiona gets pregnant from this bloke Craig she had a rebound one-night stand with. After she tells Craig, they start dating casually. He still lives with his wife. Then his dad dies. And Fiona feels she hardly knows this bloke. Marty goes on a date with Craig’s wife Sue. Craig just thinks all Sue is doing is trying to get back at him. What Marty wants is to be accepted and loved, instead of being called a freak. So, he’s about to jump off a flat when he thinks he’s being used. It’s Debbie who is able to talk him down. And in the end, Sue does really want him.

Even while on the run from the law, Steve tries contacting Fiona, but now that she’s pregnant with Craig’s child it puts her into a difficult situation. So, she ignores Steve’s attempts to avoid having to choose. But Steve persists and eventually approaches Debbie at school and gives her a package for Fiona. Everyone knows she’s still madly in love with Steve. It’s Veronica who calls him (on the cell phone that was in the package). He overhears Fiona talking to Veronica about Craig. He doesn’t care. He just wants to be with Fiona and make her happy. Craig walks in, gets into an argument with Steve, trips and has to go to the hospital. Fiona and Steve take the opportunity to pack some things and drive away. It’s a very emotional moment, everyone is happy for Fiona, but she is worried about her brothers and sister. Will she be back or stay with Steve? We have to wait until the next season for the answer. Great show! Nice little E.L.P. at the end there, too.

Shameless – Series 2a

Let’s return to Manchester’s Chatsworth Estate and see what the Gallagher family has been up to since last season! Just before Christmas, Kevin and Lip steals some meat off a truck and sells it down the pub. Before you know it, the police are all over the place. Soon after, the army comes marching into town. The stolen meat was not for human consumption, but intended for a defense lab to test it for contamination. Yeah, I know, how do they come up with this stuff? Ian is taken ill. Sheila’s gone into labor. But now the whole town is under quarantine. Lip and Kev have to steal a military truck to get Ian and Sheila out of town. Folks are after Kev for selling them the contaminated meat. Lip tells them it’s the army who poisoned the food, and they should give them the vaccines. So they all storm to the soldiers and cause a raucous. Throughout, Frank’s lost on a drunken stupor.

Frank’s father, Neville, arrives unannounced at Sheila’s house. “I’m sure Frank thinks you’re dead,” she blurts out. He’s coming to see his new grandchildren, but also in hopes of turning his son to correct his ways – unsuccessfully, of course. Neville nearly had a heart attack. Frank’s not the kind of man you’d want to leave alone with your kids, for when Sheila has to leave for a few days when her mother is on her deathbed, Frank lets his mate babysit, who invites all his friends to run a private bar. Frank also has an accident at Kash Karib’s local store. He gets offered assistance for a hefty insurance, which would close Kash down. Not only would Ian lose his job, the whole neighborhood is putting pressure on Frank. He decides to drop the charges. But now he has to pay for all the legal counseling and medical treatment he received. Sheila calls in on a TV quiz and wins £1,000 with which she pays off Frank’s debt. Except that Kev had already blackmailed the insurance people to wave the fees. Truth be told, Frank’s finest moment comes when Social Services happens round checking on his family, and he defends Fiona as the true caretaker of his children and doing a better job than her mother ever could.

Sheila’s estranged daughter, sexy Karen, gets herself a job at the local pub, The Jockey, pretending to fancy the Lesbian owner Jez. Veronica hates the idea of Kevin working with the seductive temptress, but only gets herself into trouble. Party-hardy Kev and Vee try adopting a child (because he can’t give her a child of their own). This scatterbrained social worker arrives, the morning after another space-cake binge, with an awkward ten-year old Eric. Although they come to love Eric, they have to let him go when they realize they are just not up to the task. Mostly, Kev and Veronica are there to help the Gallaghers – even if they dump her pyromaniac, Tourette’s spewing brother Marty and their mother on the Gallaghers, after Marty burned down his mother’s house.

When Frank’s eldest, Fiona, catches a text on her boyfriend Steve’s cell from some girl, she’s afraid he has met someone else. Turns out, though, he actually has a daughter he never said a word about before. Fiona doesn’t know if she can still trust him if he hid that from her, but when he proposes, all she can cry is “yes!” They visit the church and start planning their nuptials. Steve, as we know, if also a car thief, but family friend, police officer Tony, is on to him. They struck a deal to keep Steve out of jail. To spite him, though, Tony nicks one of Steve’s stolen cars – only to find out the ceiling is filled with cash: money Steve’s made dealing coke. Tony returns the car, but without the money or the coke, so that he can tell Steve to quit dealing or he’ll tell Fiona. Then, Tony botches things up really bad. Steve has to run both for the law and for the gangster he was dealing with – leaving Fiona practically at the altar.

And with that the Cricket will leave you, too, until next week, when we’ll chirp some more about the series.

Shameless - Series 1

A buddy of mine told me I should watch this British Chanel 4 comedy series Shameless. At first I had to get used to all the cursing, the vulgarities, the drunk talk, the stiffies, the quickies, and all the other frustrations of the British underclass. But then it dawned on me: shameless sex and drinks, that’s me! It’s about single-dad Frank Gallagher, his six kids and their friends: his daughter Fiona and her boyfriend Steve; his sons Philip and Ian; and his youngest kids crazy Carl, Debbie and Liam; and their neighbors Kevin and Veronica. Frank himself is a welfare-check (“giro”) cashing, good-for-nothing drunk, and is missing more often than not. Fiona is the bread winner in the family and responsible for raising her siblings. Her boyfriend Steve is a well-meaning middle-class whackjob of a car thief, who offers all the support Fiona needs, but she can’t seem to believe he’s for real. Ian is gay and has a relation with a married Muslim man, but is afraid to tell anyone, except this one girl who came on to him and then became his cover-up girlfriend.

Neighbor Kev asks his girlfriend of nine years, Veronica, to marry him, only because he told this girl who was pursuing him at the bar that he was getting married. Well, that, and to cash in on the money Vee’s deceased father left her. She also has a pyromaniac brother with Tourette’s syndrome. Then there’s lovely sex-starved Sheila (whose husband recently left her, and who suffers from so many phobias, she never leaves the house) and her delicious daughter Karen, who licks her spoon likes she’s having sex and who was briefly dating Lips, and then has an affair with Frank when he moved in with her mother Sheila... Quite a disturbing mother-daughter, father-son rectangulation... Shameless? Yes, certainly! Lots of hilarious comedy, profound drama, superb acting, excellent dialogue, compelling narratives. My warmest recommendation.